Tantric-Somatics: new paradigm for Men’s Sexual Health

Challenges of Erectile Dysfunction and Premature Ejaculations

A lot of men experience concerns about their sexual functions at some point in their life, such as erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation — if we follow the clinical definition and terminologies commonly used.

Often, these issues are not caused by any physical illness. There are typically no neurological or physiological reasons for these conditions, and medical science may have limited options to address them directly.

For them, taking pills becomes an easy solution to ensure and sustain an erection or to numb their sensations to delay orgasm and ejaculations. However, these approaches often come at the great cost, such as further disconnecting with the body or becoming dependent on pharmaceuticals.

Reframing Sexual Health Through a Tantric-Somatic lens

Fortunately, all is not lost if we look the concerns about men's sexual health through the lens of Tantric-Somatics.

Firstly, it is important to understand these experiences without automatically pathologizing them, especially when no physiological causes can be identified. The psyche plays a significant role in sexual arousal, and labeling challenging experiences as “dysfunction” can be counterproductive. It may turn a temporary condition into a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Words are powerful. What we say to ourselves and others directly impacts our relationships, our self-perception, and our intimacy. We can choose our words more thoughtfully. For example, instead of framing these issues as something dysfunctional or substandard, we might describe them as not having full control over the state of arousal and the timing of ejaculation.

For some, this reframing alone can already make a meaningful difference. This opens the door to working on these aspects, such as through training on somatic body awareness, learning and practicing tantric tools, understanding one’s erotic responses with a holistic attitude informed by tantra and somatics , and learning self-regulation techniques.

Brother’s Blues

By acknowledging the emotional and psychological dimensions of erectile and ejaculation challenges, we begin to see how lifestyle factors influence our capacity for enjoyment and fulfillment in intimacy.

Pressure and Stress

Our society emphasizes performance and achievement. We are conditioned to measure ourselves according to specific standards and to compare ourselves with other people. We are constantly trying to meet external standards and internal expectations. We are always under stress, which create chronic tension and anxiety in our body and mind. It often goes unnoticed or even normalized, until it interferes with our life significantly, manifesting as burnout, low libido, pelvic tension that constricts blood flow for a healthy erection, impression of excessive sex drive, or the feeling of urgency for ejaculation during sex.

Lack of confidence

Confidence significantly affects how we show up in relationships and intimacy. Negative thoughts and feelings can spiral downwards. We may feel overwhelmed, as our emotions overshadow our ability and willpower to stay in control over the state of erection and the timing of ejaculation. Eventually, this may even erode our confidence to initiate intimacy.

Shame and guilt

Sexuality has been shrouded with shame and guilt in most of human history, and often, our personal history. Young boys and teenagers often have their early experiences of sexuality with masturbation in secrecy and with urgency for fear of judgement, which can also reinforce patterns like quick ejaculation. These emotions make us shrink, literally. It puts our body into contraction and tightens up. It constricts our breath and blood flow, which affects erectile function.

Loss of trust

Difficult experience in past relationships and sexual encounters may also leave our body and mind contracted, especially if it was frequent, or chronic. Sometimes, new relationships or new partners may help re-write and rewire our intimacy patterns. However, in some cases, the imprints of the negative experience linger, affecting our ability to fully engage with new partners or initiate intimacy.

Limiting ideas and believes

Conventional notions of sexuality and masculinity often focus solely on penile penetration, neglecting the richness of other forms of intimacy. There may be some foreplay, but it just aims to get ready for the final act. This narrow perspective can create unnecessary pressure for having or maintaining an erection, and at the same time, it limits possibilities for pleasure, intimacy and enjoyment.

Technologies for Better Arousal and Orgasms

The most effective technology is not medication but our own mind and body - if we learn how to harness our innate abilities.

Rewiring the mind

Limiting ideas and believes are rooted in social and cultural conditioning. What we experience directly, what we saw and what we were told about sex and sexuality gave us a lot false ideas. The good news is : what is learned can also be unlearned. This is the science of neuroplasticity as informed by modern somatics.

Sex is not a lack of virtue, nor is it debauchery or sin. It is not about performance. It is not domestic chores. It is not stress release. And it definitely is not like the pornography we have seen. With openness and discernment, we can befriend sexuality and explore new ideas and inspirations. With willingness and curiosity to see and think beyond the familiar, exploring new horizons can be nourishing, vitalizing, joyful, exciting, fun.

Emotional healing

Intertwined with the myriad of false ideas about sex are some very difficult feelings, such as guilt, shame, and anxiety. They are very common and sometimes deeply ingrained in our intimate memories, sexual self, and gender identity. They can make us feel overwhelmed or helpless.

Healing these emotions is not about rejecting, ignoring or suppressing them. But it is also not about ruminating or criticizing them. True healing involves accepting them as they are, witnessing their ebbs and flows. That is probably the best way to release the excessive energetic charges of unwanted emotions. This is a path of emotional and energetic integration based on both tantric healing and somatic approaches.

Reconfiguring the body

"The body does not lie". The problem is that we are disconnected to it, ignoring its signals, until it loses its natural ability to self-regulate between expansion and contraction. We accumulated a lot of tension in the muscular and nervous systems. They become over-toned, or even got stuck in a chronic state of contraction.

Informed by modern science of somatics, the key to reconfiguring the body is by identifying the mechanisms of our own sexual glitches and triggers, learning to activate the parasympathetic nervous system, undoing unconscious holding, and initiating conscious relaxation, for example. As we become more intimately in tune with our body, we can regain the ability to restore balance and natural responsiveness.

How Tantric-Somatics sessions support Men’s sexual health

While these tantric-somatic approaches may seem complex initially, they are actually quite accessible and manageable.

Erosomatic Approach

Combining Tantra and Somatics, my approach fosters your deep connection with yourself at the most intimate and core level. It emphasizes cultivating somatic awareness in the whole body, especially in the pelvic region and the genitals. You also learn to reuniting your consciousness with your breath, sensing the body deeply, while diving deep into the realm of Eros. These practices help cultivate intimate embodied mindfulness, rewire the mind, integrate emotions, and reconfigure the body for better arousal and orgasm.

Online and In-Person Sessions

In my sessions, you will experience a caring and loving presence that holds you gently, inspires freedom, and ignites your inner power. The sessions can be done online or in-person, either through Tantric-Somatic bodywork (with touch by the practitioner), or only coaching (without touch by the practitioner). The benefits of in-person touch-based bodywork are profound. It is a deeply regenerative and healing experience on its own. And once your body assimilates new ways of being, you can continue your self-healing journey with practical tools for home practices.

Tantric-Somatic Bodywork

Focused physical presence and accompaniment can accelerate the assimilation and integration of tantric-somatic practices. Resonance can help release energetic blockages, especially in physical proximity. Being done mindfully and lovingly, physical touch stimulates the body to regulate its neurochemical responses, such as increased oxytocin and serotonin, that support emotional healing. The variety in the quality of physical touch can also bring comfort, pleasure, or ignite sensuality. Biodynamics is also a potent tool that requires precision and deep listening, provided by trained and experienced professional.

Self-healing

In fact, healing can only come from within. The only person who can ever heal us is ourselves. However, embarking on this journey requires courage and commitment. Dedicated support, accompaniment and guidance from an experienced Tantric-Somatic practitioner can facilitate your learning and make the process much easier, faster, more inspiring, and deeper.

Personalized Coaching And Bodywork

Unlike pre-recorded materials, my sessions are adapted to you and your state of being. I support you to set the truest intentions and find out what is right for you. You will be guided in your personalized intimate journey to discover your innate embodied wisdom with clarity and simplicity.

Gradual progression and combining Approaches

For some, starting with coaching sessions without touch may be advisable—especially when dealing with big sexual trauma or conflicting cultural beliefs, for example. This gradual approach allows for safe, foundational work before receiving physical touch. If in doubt, you are most welcome to ask for a free consultation (up to 30 minutes) to support you to have a better understanding and decide how the process can be adapted to work best for you.

Take This Step Now

The wisdom for more enjoyable sexuality and better sexual health already resides in you. It awaits your discovery.

You can begin your healing journey at any time.

Take this step now.